Please join the Alaska friends and family of Dan Carter-Incontro, a civil rights champion and good friend to many, for a Celebration of his Life & Legacy during Alaska Pride Week, on Saturday, June 19, from 3-5 p.m. at St. Mary's Episcopal Church in Anchorage.
Dan died on April 18 in Clermont, Florida, at the age of 62. He is survived by his husband and partner of 42 years, Al Carter-Incontro, and his sister Sarah. Memorial services were held in Florida and Anchorage, but the local Celebration of Life was delayed until Al could join us.
Dan lived in Anchorage for about 30 years, worked for the Transit Department, and was a supporter of the Anchorage Gay and Lesbian Community Center, Identity, the Metropolitan Community Church, and other LGBT groups. He was also active in the Alaska Democratic Party and served as Alaska's first openly gay democratic delegate. The new LGBT Democratic Caucus has been named after him, as the conference room in the Community Center was named after Dan and Al several years ago.
Celebrate the Life & Legacy of Dan Carter-Incontro: Saturday, June 19, from 3-5 p.m. at St. Mary's Episcopal Church, on the corner of Lake Otis & Tudor in Anchorage.
Bent recently posted about a gay male couple that was kicked out of Santaland RV Park near Fairbanks by a manager who seems to have a problem with gays. Below is Santaland's response. They do not acknowledge or apologize for the "misunderstanding," like Denny's did earlier this year, and the reply is not signed by an individual, so no one is taking personal responsibility for this.
However, they do state that they "welcome everyone to our park, regardless of sexual orientation or any other factor." They know the LGBT community will not accept anti-gay prejudice from businesses, and they are not likely to allow it to happen again at Santaland - which is the main goal of bringing the incident to light.
Here is their response. If the gay couple replies, that will also be posted.
Dear Sir,
I appreciate your invitation to respond to the allegation that we evicted a guest of Santaland RV Park based on sexual orientation.
With regard to this particular incident, there were a number of things that were considered when we made our decision to ask this guest to leave our park. For privacy reasons I will not go into these factors, but I can assure you that sexual orientation was never even considered in the course of our decision to evict the guest, and certainly never came up in our discussions with this particular guest.
We have had tens, if not hundreds, of thousands of happy guests through our park over the years. We have always, and will continue to welcome everyone to our park, regardless of sexual orientation or any other factor.
Juneau's Pride events for June and July include a new LGBT Film Night benefit for Alaskans Together featuring the award-wining film Out in the Silence, along with a Pride Picnic at Skater's Cabin, a hike at West Glacier, a drag show benefit for Four A's, and local events for HIV Testing Week.
The First Annual Alaskans Together for Equality LGBT Film Fun-Raiser is on Thursday, June 17 at the Gold Town Nickelodeon Theater, 171 Shattuck Way. Doors open at 5:45 p.m. and the film schedule is below. Come for one segment or stay for the whole evening. Finger foods and refreshments will be available. Bring your checkbook and cash for the donation baskets. Membership in Alaskans Together for Equality, Inc. is available at all levels, from $10 up.
LGBT Film Fun-Raiser Schedule - June 17
6:00 – 7:00 p.m. Dramatic Narrative Shorts
Coming to Terms – College student deals with coming out by phone
The Manual – Sent to psychiatric institution as a boy, Sonny tries to help niece avoid similar treatment
The Call – Lesbian women interact with their sperm donor
Two Encounters – Hidden cameras reveal difference in treatment of blacks and whites in gay bars
7:15 - 8:15 p.m. Main Feature
Out in the Silence – Challenges of coming out and living in small towns and rural America
The film will be followed by an optional discussion in a breakout room led by Juneau Assembly member Jonathan Anderson
8:30 – 9:30 p.m. Humor & Love Shorts
Hi Maya – Mature women strike up relationship in hair salon
Float – Male love in the Bahamas
Hummer – Dinner party brings surprises for women participants
For further information or to help with the event, email Kelli or Marsha.
Watch the trailer for Out in the Silence:
Juneau's other LGBT events for June and July include the Mendenhall hike, the Pride Picnic, the Friday social, a drag show fundraiser for Four A's, and free testing during National HIV Testing Week.
Mendenhall Journey: June 19, 2010. Meet at 9:30 AM at the trail head of West Glacier Trail. Round trip is 5-6 hours, distance is 3.4 miles one-way, bring a lunch and water to drink, trail mix would also be wise, good footwear is mandatory. The hike departs promptly at 10 AM. Do not be late! Access directions: take Montana Creek Road from the Mendenhall Loop road, and follow the signs to the campground. Go past the campground entrance, and Skater's cabin to the parking area at the end of the road. This trail is rated "more difficult" by the Juneau hiking trail guide. There is some rock scrambling/climbing involved to reach the ice caves.
Annual Pride Picnic with SEAGLA and PFLAG: July 17, 2010 at Skater's Cabin from 4-8PM. Please plan to be there. Bring a salad and whatever you would like to drink, glass is not allowed. Firewood might be good depending on weather. Volunteers are requested to help with set up, breakdown, music, and a BBQ grill. SEAGLA will provide paper plates, cups and plastic ware that we already have. Also we will provide some burgers both meat and non-meat as well as hot dogs, and soft drinks. But if you can bring a salad or bake some cookies or a cake that would be great.
Friday Social: June 18, June 25, 2010. Each Friday after work from 6-8 PM, community members and their friends, both men and women are invited to get together. Drop by the Jaded Lounge in the Goldbelt Hotel, downtown Juneau to unwind from the work week. If you are over 21, you are invited to join us. Please try it out this Friday, or another Friday in the future. Come on out, and make a new friend today! Visit SEAGLA for future locations.
Drag Queen and King show: July 9, 2010 at the Rendezvous Bar. Marguerite the recently appointed Duchess of Juneau is planning a local Drag Queen and King show and recycled flogger making party as a fundraiser for Four A's, at the Rendezvous Bar on Friday July 9th, and she's looking for help. Donations of time, supplies, ideas and funds are welcome. Please email Marguerite.
National HIV Testing Week is an annual campaign coordinated by the National Association of People with AIDS to encourage people of all ages to "Take the Test, Take Control." National HIV Testing Week is June 21-27, 2010. The Four A's will be providing free testing (Oral Swab, results in 20 minutes) at closed and public locations for the whole week in Juneau. The public locations:
Tuesday, June 22: 7-10 p.m. at Rendezvous
Wednesday, June: 23 11-4 p.m. at Blaze and 4-8 p.m. at Four A's
Thursday, June 24: 8:30 a.m.– 3:30 p.m. Free blood draws at Juneau Public Health (no appointment necessary) and 8-11 p.m. at Alaskan Bar
Friday, June 25: 4-8 p.m. at Four A's
Free HIV Testing also available at Four A's (174 S Franklin Street, #207/Above Heritage Coffee) during business hours, call 586-6089 for an appointment.
The Bear Tooth is hosting a GLBT Mini-Fest for Anchorage Pride Week with three movies: City of Borders (an Israeli documentary), The Big Gay Musical (a romantic date movie) - both showing on Monday June 21 - and the 1994 classic The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert showing Thursday June 24.
In the heart of Jerusalem stands an unusual symbol of unity that defies generations of segregation, violence and prejudice: a gay bar called Shushan. City of Borders goes inside this vibrant underground sanctuary on the East/West border of the Holy City, where people of opposing nationalities, religions and sexual orientations create a community among people typically viewed as each other's "enemy." The documentary follows the daily lives of the five Israeli and Palestinian patrons as they navigate the minefield of politics, religion and discrimination to live and love openly. In observing the lives of the bar regulars, City of Borders explores the bond forged when people from warring worlds embrace what everyone shares in common - the right to be accepted and belong - rather than be defined, or limited by the differences that tear them apart. (Israel, US 2009, not rated)
The Bear Tooth is hosting a GLBT Mini-Fest for Anchorage Pride Week with three movies: City of Borders (an Israeli documentary), The Big Gay Musical (a romantic date movie) - both showing on Monday June 21 - and the 1994 classic The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert showing Thursday June 24.
The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert: Thursday, June 24 at 10 PM, tickets $3
This is the tale of two drag queens and a transsexual who embark on a road trip to a remote resort town in the Australian desert on a bus christened Priscilla. When Anthony "Tick"/Mitzi (Hugo Weaving) is invited to perform in Alice Springs, he recruits flamboyant young stud Adam/Felicia (Guy Pearce) and the legendary, refined Bernadette (Terence Stamp) to join him. Mitzi, however, fails to disclose one important fact to his friends: his wife is the one who invited them to Alice Springs.
With one big secret about to be revealed and another one up his sleeve, Mitzi is a little stressed. With long hours on the road ahead of them, the trio lip-synchs campy songs on the bus, creates fabulous costumes, and meets a multitude of colorful characters along the way. They party with friendly aborigines, are confronted by judgmental townspeople who are averse to drag queens, and meet Bob (Bill Hunter), a warmhearted mechanic and drag fan who joins them for the last leg of their trip when their bus breaks down in the middle of nowhere.
Fantastic costumes and fabulous makeup abound, and fine performances are delivered all around. But perhaps most important are the implicit messages that families come in all forms, that friends can make a family, and that love really knows no boundaries.
It's the Australian film that blitzed overseas box offices. It caused a near riot at the Cannes Film Festival. It won an Academy Award®. It's fun, daring, over-the-top and unforgettable. It's a road movie with attitude and the occasional frock. (Australia 1994, Rated R)
The Bear Tooth is hosting a GLBT Mini-Fest for Anchorage Pride Week with three movies: City of Borders (an Israeli documentary), The Big Gay Musical (a romantic date movie) - both showing on Monday June 21 - and the 1994 classic The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert showing Thursday June 24.
Paul and Eddie have just begun previews for the new Off-Broadway musical "Adam and Steve Just the Way God Made 'Em." Their lives strangely mirror the characters they are playing. Paul is looking for the perfect man and Eddie is dealing with how his sexuality and faith can mix. After yet another disastrous dating experience, Paul has an epiphany. He is done dating and just wants to be a slut like the sexy chorus boys that share his dressing room. Eddie has to tell his parents that he's gay and is starring in a show that calls the bible the "Breeder's Informational Book of Living Examples". Eddie comes out to his family and Paul goes on Manhunt. Eddie's parents are destroyed by the news and Paul can't even have a good one-night stand. But after musical numbers with scantly clad tap dancing angels, a retelling of Genesis, tele-evangelists, a camp that attempts to turn gay kids straight, and a bunch of showtunes, everyone realizes that life gets better once they accept who they really are. And they are just the way God made 'em. (US 2009, not rated)
The "I'm From Driftwood" project collects and shares true LGBT stories from all over the world, based on the towns where people were raised, and they're starting a 50 state tour this year. They only have two stories from Alaska, both by gay men, one from Eagle River (posted below) and one from Juneau. The guy who wrote "I'm From Juneau, AK" now lives in Texas, but he came out in Alaska:
I had my first [coming out] conversation twenty-nine years ago, driving my friend, Trent, back from a high school dance in downtown Juneau to his house near mine in the Valley:
"I want to tell you something, but I'm afraid it could hurt our friendship, and I don't want it to. It's hard to talk about, and I've been avoiding telling you, but I want to."
"Okay."
"I'm gay."
"Okay. It's no big deal. Just slow down!" Apparently, my nervousness had caused me to tense up and clamp down, including clamping my foot down on the gas pedal.
"Well," I thought afterward, "that went a lot better than I feared."
The Driftwood team is still planning and fundraising for the 50-State Story Tour. They expect to fly to Alaska in November 2010.
There are gay stories from every corner of the Earth and I think they should be told. But why? What does it mean??
To the gay teens struggling to come out and deal with their sexuality, who to this day still attempt suicide 4 times more than straight kids, it says "you are not alone." Other people have dealt with similar situations, families, communities and churches, and have overcome and are now living happy lives. It can happen for you, too. It gets soooo much better, I promise. Hang in there, kiddo.
And to the people who don't support equal rights, it says we're not all that different after all. We all have stories and problems and loves and lives just like everyone else. So maybe we should all be treated like everyone else, too.
The other Alaska story, "I'm From Eagle River, AK" by John Ashton, is about the anti-gay hostility he feels and the importance of coming out:
"Mom, I have something I need to tell you." I said, trying to find the words. "I don't know how to tell you this, so I will just put it out there. I am gay."
There are some things in my life that I never considered that I would be sharing with my mother, or any of my family for that matter. I never saw my preference in a love partner as anyone's business but mine. The climate of hostility that still surrounds the issue of gay and lesbian people only secured the thought in my mind. All of that changed last year.
In January of 2009 a good friend of mine, Chris, passed away from complications with the HIV virus. I took his death hard, but in a way it helped me more than I knew at the time. The whole time that I knew Chris he pushed me to talk with my family about being gay. He told me that the closet put so much stress on me that I wasn't even able to see yet. When he passed away I was finally able to see what he meant.
For over a month I was not able to discuss with anyone that a close friend of mine had just died. I was not able to cry about it. I was not able to deal with the feelings that his death brought up in me. Instead these feelings were only allowed to fester and grow inside of me until I could not bear it anymore.
I called my mom one morning. "Mom, we need to talk. Would it be alright if I came over tonight?"
"I would love to talk with you, John." She said. "Come over when I get home from work."
Even with the now obvious stress that keeping quiet was putting on me, I almost backed down. I almost chose to remain silent. The level of hostility that still remains in society around the issue of gay and lesbian people scared me enough that I was not sure how my own mother would take this news.
"Mom, I have something I need to tell you. I don't know how to tell you this, so I will just put it out there. I am gay."
"I am not shocked." my mother said.
"Is that all?" I asked, ready for any response.
"John, I still love you. I am not shocked by this. If you are going to choose to explore this path, I will support you. There may come a time when things change for you. You don't really know who you are until you are a bit older." she said.
I had a mixture of feelings. Mostly overwhelming joy, though. There was a subtle hint of annoyance, but joy overpowered this. She still loved me. These were the words I was hoping to hear for longer than I realized.
"What made you want to tell me this now?" She asked me.
I explained to her that I had a friend that had died recently, and that having to hide this part of me meant having to hide my pain in relation to him.
The conversation went long into the night. There were a lot of happy tears mixed with some sad ones. When the conversation drew to a close my mom offered these last words.
"John, I want you to be happy. If this is what will make you happy I will support you. If you bring someone home, though, be sure it is someone I would approve of, male or female."
In the months since this I have had similar conversations with the other members of my family. I look back on the last 9 years that I spent hiding with a lot of regret. I somehow allowed other people's fear and misunderstanding of gay and lesbian people to damage and restrain my relationships with my family. I spent nearly a decade hiding from myself. Now I will spend the next decade, and longer, working to ensure that the next generation will not have to hide from themselves, or anyone else.
I leave you with the words of the author Dr. Seuss. "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
According to the guidelines, the "I'm From Driftwood" stories are based on the town and state you were raised in (not the town you live in now). 300-word stories are best, and make it a story, not an essay, a social commentary, or a rant. Try to write about something other than your coming out story. Keep it clean, this is a for-all-ages site.
Contribute a written story (guidelines and submission form HERE), set up a video interview (examples), or be a featured artist with IFD.
